


A Single Choice

by LadyofAvalon



Category: Provost's Dog - Tamora Pierce
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-12
Updated: 2012-06-12
Packaged: 2017-11-07 13:01:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/431484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyofAvalon/pseuds/LadyofAvalon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Rosto hadn't joined the Rogue?  What if he was simply a merchant and he only dreamed of the life he could have had?  A single choice could have made all the difference.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Single Choice

" _I wish things weren't like this, Rosto,_ " _Beka told him. "I really do." Rosto shrugged._

" _I knew you would never want to be with me some time ago, Beka," he replied. "I had to try. Tell me…would there have been a chance for me if I hadn't been a rusher or the Rogue?" Beka paused for a long moment, then nodded._

" _Maybe if things had been different, we could have been something, but not this way. Not as Dog and rusher. We are too different, Rosto. And I will not be my mother."_

Rosto woke with a start to find himself looking at an unfamiliar ceiling. Those dreams again. He continued to look at the wood paneling for a long moment before he shook it off and got up to get a drink of water.

They had plagued him for the whole trip to Tortall from Scanra. His father suspected he was losing sleep over them, but he wasn't. Well, not that he _knew_ of. They were a little irritating, because they were always the same scene or a variation thereof. The same girl was in all of them, on top of that.

She was pretty enough, he would admit. Even if she was a figment of his imagination, she was very easy on the eyes. It was really a pity that she couldn't exist. It was odd, though, that she had been in his dreams constantly for two weeks. Beka. That was her name. Part of him wondered if she was actually real and he had met her once or twice in Scanra or something of the sort. The fact that they were speaking Common threw a rock into his ideas. He had been taught Common when he was younger because his father was a merchant, but he had never used it on a regular basis.

He shook his head, rearranging himself in the bed. These dreams were so odd. Him, the Rogue? Unlikely. He had considered pursuing that, but that was when his father had been away for three years without any sign of coming back. He had chosen to put it off one more year and his father had come back, rendering the idea of joining the thieves inconsiderable. His mother had gone off with the band of players she was a part of and left him with his father. In the end, whoever this dream version of him had become, it was not who he was, nor who he wanted to be.

There was a part of him that wondered about the girl, though. What if she was real? What if the dreams were glimpses of what his life could have been? His brother had been known to have a dream like that before. Those, however, had been few and far between. They were more likely just dreams. These were…odd. There was no other way to describe them. They made no sense to him.

Now if only he could sleep again, he would be happy.

* * *

" _There's not a chance in the world," Rosto told her. "This is who I am, Beka. I made this choice a long time ago. I'm too settled in my ways to change them. You know I love you, but love doesn't mean that I'll change just like that."_

" _You know that giving you this chance was hard enough, Rosto," Beka replied. "I need you to promise that you won't let this come between us. I know I said that things could never work between us…and that's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of being my mother. I'm afraid of losing everything because of what I feel towards you…"_

" _It was a choice. All I ask is that you accept this. I'm willing to put the Rogue behind me for you, but it will take time. I cannot just change overnight like you seem to think that I can," he said. "And you will just have to accept that. It is a fact that is completely unchangeable. Be patient."_

" _I'm trying. I just want this waiting to be over. I just want us to be able to be together, Rosto…" He smiled at her and nodded._

" _I know. In time, Beka. Just wait a little while longer and everything will be done."_

* * *

He was riding through the Lower City with his father when he saw her. Rosto had not even been looking for the girl from the dreams when he saw her. She was simply yet another person in the crowds until she moved out of it and into one of the buildings. She was dressed in an all black uniform. Just like the dream.

Rosto looked away from her, his mind moving faster than he would have liked. Was there any chance that his dreams could have been real? No. No, no, no. He was not going to go there. The only reason he was even in this city was because it was good for business. He still had his sister to support, particularly if he wanted to give her the dowry she should have gotten had their father not gotten himself so deeply in debt.

This was not what he needed right now. He needed to focus on everything that he had to do while he was in Corus. Not on some pretty girl he would never see again unless he came back here. Most certainly not one who appeared in his dreams as she had.

It was hours later that he found himself in a tavern to get something to eat before he returned to the inn he was staying at. He did not even see her come in. He did see her, however, when she and two other people in the same uniform passed the table he was sitting at. Rosto tried not to pay attention to her, but the glimpse of her haunting blue-grey eyes would not leave his mind. It wasn't until he got up to get a last drink before he left that they actually spoke. The barkeeper was attempting to flirt with her and was being completely rebuffed.

"Leave the girl alone. She obviously doesn't want your attentions. There are other customers here that are more interested in your time," Rosto told him. He gave the girl a smile when she stared at him. She looked away from him, a faint blush coloring her cheeks. "You are…?" he asked softly.

"Beka," she replied. "Beka Cooper."

"Rosto," he told her.

"No last name?" Beka asked. He shook his head.

"No last name," he said. "It's easier not to live on the shadows of other people," he added. Beka nodded.

"What brings you to Corus?" she asked, picking up the drinks she had gotten up for.

"Trading – I'm a merchant." Beka gave him a smile.

"Mayhap I'll see you before you go, then," she said. Rosto smiled in return.

"Perhaps," he replied. Then she was gone, moving towards the table.

He saw her again the next day, which he had not expected. He had been waiting to be paid when he caught sight of her. It wasn't until she had caught sight of him and had moved over to stand next to him that he really noticed her. Part of him had still been in the little dream world. Everything was so different there. It was strange, really.

In the dreams, he was an entirely different person. It was as if one choice had changed his personality entirely. Perhaps that was so. It was impossible to tell, really. All he really knew was that things could have been much different.

As time passed, he found that he could not bring himself to leave Corus. He had found his place there, with Beka by his side. He did not yearn for whatever life he could have had or the person he could have been. He was happy with her, and he would rather have that than whatever being the Rogue could bring to him.

The dreams never ended, but they were as happy as he was. That, he was glad of.


End file.
